Well, the holidays always bring a surprise or two but thankfully not nearly as large a surprise as Suzy Favor Hamilton revealed. You know Suzy as a three time Olympic 1500 meter runner, most famous for running the Olympics after her Olympic brother Dan had recently died. Suzy has now admitted to working for an escort service in Las Vegas for the last year. Anywhere but Vegas that means as a high price call girl. News reports indicate she was not in need of money having a successful real estate business, $600,000 house, and giving paid motivational speeches approximately 60 times a year. Just my luck, I always go to the motivational speeches where the football coach talks about never giving up and character building. I’ve never been to a motivational speech by a paid escort although with my luck I’d hire a paid escort and all she would give was a motivational speech. There has, however, been a time or two where I thought the person speaking was sort of prostituting themselves in a different way.
The amazing part of the story is that Suzy claims her husband knew about the job, but in her words did not approve. She made $600 per hour and I assume ran real slow during this time with her customers. Suzy says about her husband’s disapproval “He tried, he tried to get me to stop. He was not supportive of this at all” Say what? He tried to get me to stop, he did not approve? It sounds like she is talking about a decision to drive a red sports car instead of a Volvo. I mean I’ve heard of husband’s trying to get their wives to quit a second job, you know “honey it’s taking too much time from the kids, I don’t like you working these late hours.” What did husband say when she left for this one each night?” Be careful, have a good time. No uh wait I mean don’t work too hard.” Or “ Tell me all about it when you get home? “ Perhaps this is one time when the husband says “be sure and bring your work home.”
Poor hubby I guess he had to leave $600 bucks on the dresser and get an appointment. How does 5:15 to 6:15 Thursday sound at the Sands Inn? Suzy says she “fully intends to make amends and get back to being a good mother , wife, daughter, and friend” Yeah right, I’m sure the New Year’s Eve party at the Johnson’s will be a blast. Hubby, “ Yes Suzy and I went through a rough patch but things are better now. “ Best friend Bob, “ I know we all have our ups and downs in marriage, oops bad analogy, but I understand what you mean. We all have to work through issues from time to time. By the way can you give Suzy this $1200 bucks I owe her? “
I don’t know about the rest of America but in Dawson, Georgia Suzy would be about as welcome at a party, after this confession, as Michael Vick at a PETA convention. By the women, I mean. The guys would be understanding and probably even downright empathetic. “Just let me know if you ever need anyone to talk to Suzy. I’m here for you if you need me.” As a matter of fact, Suzy contends this behavior was brought on by depression and was a coping mechanism. Obviously, until now, I’ve not seen many depressed women.
Suzy was making appearances for Disney and The Rock ‘n Roll Marathon Series prior to this miscue. Now we know why Mickey Mouse is always smiling. There is no word yet on whether she’ll continue on the speaking tour.
Contact columnist T. Gamble at firstname.lastname@example.org.