T. GAMBLE: Dennis Rodman more than an embarrassment

OPINION: Even the time-honored excuse of drinking too much does not excuse Dennis Rodmans behavior

T. Gamble

T. Gamble

I’m now back from my excursion to Pasadena, where I watched Auburn get a dose of their own medicine, and I must say it was not a pleasant tasting one at that.

But, while I returned from California, Dennis Rodman was, unfortunately, returning from his latest visit to North Korea. Dennis went over there on a mission to help train North Koreans in how to play basketball. It is very important for them to play basketball well, while most of their fellow countrymen starve to death.

While there, Dennis insulted most anyone with a brain — which means he did not insult himself — by insinuating that Kenneth Bae, a Korean descent American who has been sentenced to 15 years hard labor for telling North Koreans about Christianity, was at least partially responsible for his own plight.

Outrage soon followed, and Dennis responded by saying, “I embarrassed a lot of people …”

I’ll stop right there before moving any further into Dennis’s explanation/apology. Dennis made the statement he embarrassed a lot of people while wearing a basketball jersey, loud shades, a ring through his lip, three earrings on one ear, and four on the other, including one big enough to serve as a dog water dish if turned on its side, dyed blonde hair, and tattooed from head to toe. I’m pretty sure Dennis passed the embarrassment stage years before this latest episode.

But, he did offer a time-honored excuse that even I have been known to fall back upon on occasion. Yes, he said, “I had been drinking. It’s not an excuse but by the time the interview happened, I was upset. I was overwhelmed.”

Well, if I were in North Korea with dictator Kim, I would probably be drinking as well. Kim, if you do not know, just had his beloved uncle executed because he was a threat to take over leadership; at least that is what Kim claimed. He was executed along with 20-some-odd other “threats.”

He also executed his ex-girlfriend in an effort to appease his new wife. See, even brutal dictators must take steps to keep mama happy or ain’t nobody happy. One can only hope there are not too many more ex-girlfriends around or the presidential palace may become a virtual killing field.

Rumors abounded that the uncle was thrown to a pack of starving dogs for the method of execution and although this appears to be only a rumor, at the same time, it lets you know this guy is not exactly Mr. Rogers. He also has massive re-education camps where entire families, including little children, are forced to perform hard labor as punishment for any alleged crime of any member of their family. Reports indicate few, if any, make it out of these camps alive.

So, Dennis says Kim is his friend and “a very good guy.” What a shame Dennis was not alive to meet Hitler. They could have partied the night away together and Germany might now be winning gold medals in Olympic basketball.

Although Rodman appears to be off his rocker, I do note that the exhibition game between North Korea and Rodman’s American team ended with a victory by North Korea 47-39. I suspect had good ol’ U.S.A. won, Dennis might have been fed to the dogs … if they would have him. Even Rodman recognizes this fact, I imagine.

All I know is, it is bad enough that the poor North Koreans have to live under the brutal reign of Kim but what transgression must they have done to deserve Dennis Rodman coming over every few months, too?

Oh, well, maybe a good ball team will keep Kim happy, ‘cause over there not only do you need mama happy but I think one better keep daddy happy, too. The fact it takes Dennis Rodman to accomplish this feat removes any doubt as to whether Kim is stark raving mad. I wish Dennis all the luck in the world and hope he can continue to enjoy his “very good guy” friend.

Email T. Gamble at wtg@colliergamble.com.