FEATURES COLUMNIST: The real world dispels notions of another baby
I wanted a baby to cuddle and smell and love on … but I didn’t want to have a baby. Not at my age or my energy level. If I were to be pregnant at this day and time, it would make for some pretty good reality television, I have no doubt.
LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST: Some headlines that would not fly, even in Missippi
The hardest part of newspaper work isn’t interviewing, writing or even designing pages. It’s writing good headlines on deadline. But sometimes the bad ones are hilarious, except to those who wrote them.
FEATURES COLUMNIST: It will be a long 27 days
With a son traveling overseas following his studies in England, it’s going to be a long 27 days.
FEATURES COLUMN: Trivia can be danergous in the brain of the blurty
Every once in a while you come across a bit of information so fascinating that you cannot wait to share it with anyone and everyone you see. Unfortunately, I’m rather blurty.
FEATURES COLUMN: I saw myself in a sitcom, sort of
It was an intervention, an impromptu one, and as it unfolded on the popular syndicated comedy show I was watching a revelation came to me. That was me… sort of.
FEATURES COLUMN: Lint indeed can be annoying
I must say I never fully appreciated the byproduct of my towels, t-shirts, and pajamas until it was brought to my attention that dryer lint can actually be quite useful.
FEATURES COLUMN: Some horses you can't lead anywhere, it turns out
If that horse could talk, he would thank me. I was going to save him from potentially running out into the highway and getting hit by a passing car.
FEATURES COLUMN: Lost puppy tugs at the heart strings and the tear ducts
As if I’m not already freakish enough crying all the time, now I’m going to have a goatee, too, at least according to a former friend.
FEATURES COLUMN: The squirrel is my nemesis, and he knows it
I’m not one to wish death on anything (except maybe snakes and lizards and roaches … definitely roaches.) But there is this squirrel, this one incredibly horrible squirrel, that I wish would die of old age or be captured in the dark of night by undercover operatives seeking to do whatever secret undercover operatives would do to a squirrel.
FEATURES COLUMN: Mom says food issues led to troubling dreams
My mother used to say that we must have eaten something that didn’t agree with us whenever we had weird dreams.
FEATURES COLUMN: A 2014 pledge to learn to make cornbread goes unfulfilled
My renunciation of learning to make cornbread is regretful. Which brings me to this year’s resolution — I am going to attempt to be smarter. Thus, the reason using the word renunciation. It’s a pretty big word for me. I learned it just this morning.
FEATURES COLUMN: Our elf has left
There has been conversation circulating at work about Elf on the Shelf, the little fellow who visits the homes of young children between Thanksgiving and Christmas and reports back to Santa Claus on the status of their nautiness and niceness.
FEATURES COLUMN: The memorable scents of Christmas do not come from scented candles
No, I don’t think I’ve ever seen candles that can remind me of the smells of Christmas I love most.
FEATURES COLUMN: Flip-flops not the best footwear for a dash in the rain
Rain, asphalt and flip-flops are a painful combination when you decide to make a run for it.
FEATURES COLUMN: There's no such thing as a box of dressing
Just the other day, I wondered if the young girl (who asked how many boxes of dressing she needed) had ever tasted real dressing, and I actually felt sorry for those who have never had the pleasure.