T. GAMBLE: Getting away with murder?

It appears half the nation is now watching the Alex Murdaugh murder trial. If I wrote a novel and named the murder suspect Murdaugh, the publisher would reject the plot and demand I name the guy something besides Murdaugh. Yep, muuur-daw. It would be considered too ridiculous, but here we are.

I must admit I have not watched very much of this fiasco, but I’ve seen many blurbs, listened to friends discuss it, and been intrigued as to what in the world is going on in that part of South Carolina. Whatever happened to catching your husband cheating and stabbing him to death?

I don’t know if the guy really killed his wife and kid. But even if he didn’t, he was surely up to enough other bad stuff to put him away for a long time. You have a son who was accused of a drunk boating homicide. A housekeeper, who they claim fell, killing herself at the Murdaugh home. A false wrongful death lawsuit that allowed the family of the housekeeper to recover a large sum except Murdaugh kept it all. Excessive drug use, including habitual opiates taken by Alex Murdaugh. And rumors of all other types of stuff.

One would think the odds of successfully killing someone are pretty low, but that is not the case. In Illinois, which leads the nation is unsolved murders, well over 50% of all murders are unsolved. Nationwide, about 50% go unsolved. So if you plan on killing someone, see if you can’t get them to go on a trip with you to Illinois. I’d suggest Chicago, where the solving rate there is somewhere around 25%, with 75% being unsolved. So if you are having marital difficulties and your spouse suggests a trip to Chicago to patch things up, don’t go. Just a small free tip here.

If not Illinois, I’d try to get in whatever court it was that O.J. Simpson landed in. That sounds like a safe bet to me.

I’m not sure what the murder conviction rate is where Murdaugh lives. I figure it’s probably better for a Murdaugh than it would be for, say a Johnson or a Jones. It’s a little too late to try and move it to Chicago anyway, so there he is.

I’m reading all types of Facebook comments indicating a large percent do not think he will be convicted. We all know Facebook is almost 100% accurate, so I’m going with not guilty, too. I can’t remember the last time Facebook was wrong except … well, never mind. Naybe he is guilty.

I assume before the end of next week we will all know what the verdict is. Once that’s over I can go back to trying to figure out what happened to Jimmy Hoffa.